Everything · Pictures · Ralph and I · The Cats

Hello my dear friends, I’m so sorry to tell you that Samantha has passed as well

This year has been and still is one of the most difficult ones yet in my life, due to the combination of frightening changes in our world and country, and heartbreaking losses of two of our sweet furbabies.

Samantha has passed on Wednesday, December 15, 2021 at 14:45, reuniting with her sweet brother Sonic and my girl Murli.

Beautiful Samantha October 17, 2021

I don’t know where to start. Samantha has had IBD (Inflammatory Bowels Disease) and after being perfectly stable and well for years, she’s had a flare up of the disease in early fall, out of the blue. We will never know what triggered it, as there had been no changes in her medication, food or even or any other events in our life. Nothing stressful happened at that time.

But ever since then, I went to the Vet countless times with her and I myself was there to pick up medications constantly. The Vet and I tried everything. Even ordered medications from outside of Austria to try after all the traditional ones didn’t help. We tried using medications off label with the Vet, as some of them have shown to help at times. All in combination with supplements, beneficial gut bacteria and various diets.

Though, nothing helped. Not even a little. Her condition kept getting worse and she kept losing weight no matter how much she ate, and she ate constantly.

We tried using injections to get a handle on the inflammation and cramps, but nothing helped. I gave her subcutaneous injections and drips myself at home. The Vet Lady had already taught me how to do that with Sonic.

The speed at which Samantha got worst increased as well. In the last 10 days, she started to eat every hour. I would fill up her bowl and she ate it all up, and wanted some more, which she always got. Then about an hour or so later, she would ask me for food again. So I fed her basically day and night in the end. Poor baby became so restless, and was up and down of the bed, or any other place she wanted to curl up at. But she would get up again within a short time.

On Monday morning I found her sitting by her water fountain, from which she normally drank all the time, but she seemed as if she forgot how to drink. Samantha would touch the water with her nose and acted as if she expected to get water that way. Then she would lift her head back up and look around confused. Soon later she started crying by the water, because she wanted to drink but could not.

I fed her water with the syringe, just like I did with Sonic and I kept her hydrated with drips, but she would cry by the water despite it all. I tried a number of different fountains and water bowls, with different levels of water, to see if anything helps. I even tried plates and put the fountains and water bowls higher up, so that Samantha would have the water right at the mouth level. Though to no avail.

The worst was seeing just how unhappy she seemed and she was in pain, despite pain medication. Her diarrhoea was becoming so frequent, it was heartbreaking. So Ralph and I knew we only had one choice left. We did not want her to suffer any worse than she already did.

I called our Vet on Tuesday morning to talk to her and we decided that she would come by our home to put Samantha to sleep the next day. She was going to call us before she would come, to talk again. But over night and the next morning, it became even more clear that there was no other choice left, as Samantha kept getting worse still.

Both Ralph and I were in a horrible state already, knowing what was to come. I ran about with my heart already broken and I could not even describe the sadness I felt and feel if I tried.

The last hours I just kept feeding her, because she was so hungry.

As the time came and our Vet was on her way, I closed the door to the rest of the apartment and stayed with Samantha in the kitchen and hallway area. Ralph could not bear to witness it, as he had to be with so many other of his beloved furbabies when they were put to sleep and these memories are still haunting him to this day.

Samantha knew the Vet Lady well and was never worried or afraid of her. So when she came, she stayed perfectly calm, acting normally and even had a few more bites to eat.

For a while we were just hanging out and talking to each other and Samantha. The Vet comforted Samantha and was so sweet to her, just like she always is.

All I want to say is that Samantha fell asleep without a hint of fear or stress visible. She fell asleep very quickly, while I held her head, so she could see me. At the same time she was also able to see the beautiful garden she always loved to look out to and she saw the sun setting with a beautiful red light in the clouds.

The rest is a blur again and I can’t even describe how I spent the rest of the evening and night. I just cried constantly. I didn’t want to call the Pet Crematory right away and decided to call them the next day and arrange a pick up for the afternoon.

I needed some time and I wanted to make sure Samantha has enough time to realise what has happened and let go of her body. I didn’t want her following her body in confusion if the pick up happened so soon after her passing.

I pray she’s reunited with Sonic and Murli now. I’m still being split between knowing that it was the right decision and wondering if Samantha feels betrayed. Because she didn’t expect to lose her life that day, even though she was very unwell. I pray she’s happy now, because the pain is gone and she’s whole again and able to do whatever she wants. I pray there is help on the other side, to make sure they are alright and that they are helped if they are disoriented or confused.

That deep pain in my heart will stay for a long time, but I am glad that Samantha and Sonic are in the same realm again. These two belong together.

Samantha was and is such a wonderful special kitty girl. An absolute beauty, with her stunning green big eyes in which you can get lost in. She had the longest purr ever, going on and on and on every time she came to bed and we went to sleep. She was Ralph’s little girl. And became my little girl as well. I wish I would have gotten to know Ralph many years sooner, but I am eternally grateful for the years I got to have with Samantha and Sonic. They made their bond with me, which will keep us connected no matter how many years will pass, until we are finally reunited again, all of us.

The following photo was taken on Saturday, December 11, 2021. Samantha and Sonic were always smaller than Murli, and grown up Hero and Lisa. But because she was getting so thin, Samantha seems even more tiny in this photo. She loved to hang out in that basket during the day. The photo on the wall above Samantha is of Sonic btw. I took it myself in Spain, when Sonic was on his way to the front balcony. Ralph always love this picture.

Hero, Lisa and Samantha

For the moment, I’m trying to distract myself from the pain as much as possible. I can’t really sleep right and haven’t really been sleeping right since Sonic passed. I just miss them both so painfully.

But I distract myself by pouring all my heart and love on Ralph, Hero and Lisa. Helping and comforting them, helps me as well.

I’m very sorry for being gone for most of the year, having only done a few posts. This whole year was a mess. I’ll post again before the holidays.

Thank you all for still coming to this little blog and for leaving all your wonderful comments. It means a lot to me. Ralph also reads all of the comments.

Sending you love and blessings.

Everything · Murli the cat · Pictures · Ralph and I · Society and News · The Cats

Is it really Fall already?

Because it looks and feels like fall for us here. The leaves are dropping faster and faster and the days are getting shorter, the nights decidedly colder. We had to put the heating on over two weeks ago, for the most part only for the nights though. Thankfully, on most days the afternoons are still warm enough for the kitties to spend a few hours out on the catio.

What we’ve been up to since the last time

Ralph and I needed some more storage space for all our combined stuff in our home. We especially wanted a storage unit for the living room. But the furniture we saw in the stores were not really what we liked. So I went to look for a storage unit from private sellers. There is a very large site in Austria with all sorts of categories of stuff that people are selling. You can find just about anything there. The only problem is you have to pick it up yourself, which isn’t all that easy with large pieces of furniture.

Minutes into me browsing the site for storage units, I saw countless beautiful pieces for a very good price. One advert was especially great since the seller also provided transport for a small charge!

It was a lovely Lady who had to sell a bunch of her things because they were moving into a smaller home and had to get rid of a few large things. So, two weeks ago, the Ladies son and one of his friends came with their huge truck and delivered the storage unit to us! The unit comes in two separate pieces, the top and the bottom. The two guys brought them in and put it together for us. It was all done within a few minutes.

And here it is!

Of course, Hero and Lisa, who are terrified of strangers, were hiding. Samantha didn’t care too much and Sonic didn’t notice anything, since he was outside on the balcony with Ralph.

I had been hoping Hero and Lisa would stay out on the balcony with Ralph, as well, where they would not have noticed as much. It didn’t even take long for Hero to come back out!

Sonic followed Ralph into the living room and had quite the surprise to see the new storage unit there! As you know, Sonic is completely deaf, so he really had no idea anything was going on while he was out on the balcony with Ralph. Hero and Sonic were first to inspect everything!

Samantha came out soon afterwards, and Hero coaxed his sister Lisa out a few minutes later.

The first thing I did was to move Murli’s urn into its new spot in the storage unit. Finally, I had a safe pace for her, where I could also see the urn all the time.

Murli’s urn and her paw print in a clay heart below

Next to Murli’s urn are her favourite mousie, her wooden toy ball, her valerian root cushion, and below is her paw print in a clay heart, that the lovely people from the pet crematory made for me back then. It feels good to be able to honour her physical remains in that way. I know her beautiful soul is watching us sometimes. One day, we will all be reunited again.

Ralph and Hero ❤

That’s my view now when I move my head to the right from my desk ❤️ Hero loves to hang out on Ralph’s desk, and also loves to walk all over his keyboard…

Continuing my crochet and starting to sew!

You might remember that I started to crochet a curtain with a cat motive at the end of last year?

This is what it will look like, although mine will be wider, to fit our window in the living room.

I was working on it at the end of 2019 and when Murli passed, I lost all motivation for anything. I just felt too sad to engage in any of my hobbies. Only by the end of this summer did I finally feel all the motivation come back, to engage in the little hobbies I love again.

In addition, I wanted to learn how to sew my own clothes, as well as mend things and create toys for the cats. Luckily I found a lovely sewing machine and ordered it!

This sewing machine had some really great reviews and wasn’t expensive. Of course, the bag I chose for it has kitties on it!

I also have a few sewing patterns for a dress and a top, that are rather easy and for beginners. I sewed before, just easy little things, but that was over 15 years ago.

Covid

We’ve been at home ever since the beginning of Covid. Ralph does not want to take a chance with anything, just in case. I only left to go buy what we need, go to the doctor for my regular prescriptions and pick up meds for Sonic and Samantha at the Vet. It’s not much different to me than any other year, since I am so limited by how much I can do physically in a day, due to the chronic migraine and fatigue. But I do really miss going for little walks with Ralph.

I’ve only been out for fun about 3 times since August, and that was to visit my best friend Conny and her two kitties.

The current data for Austria

https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/country/austria/

Today

I can’t believe it’s the 8th of October already, because this year went by faster than all the years before. And the previous years felt like they were over in a flash already!

Samantha on the window sill, Sonic on the kitty tree, Lisa on the bed near the tree, and flopped out Hero on the bed.

We had another sunny and warm afternoon. But as soon as the sun is gone, it gets chilly quickly. Some days were cold despite the sun, then the 4 kitties go into the bedroom to soak in the sun. Now that the bed is right beside the window, they absolutely LOVE it. They can lie around in the sun and see the birds while on the bed.

Cuddling up with cats

During the night, I usually have Sonic to my right, with his head next to mine on the pillow and my hand on his side. That’s how he cuddles up every time I go to bed. Lisa and Hero will either sleep along or on my legs, or one of the two will sleep way up on the left side of my head, leaning onto my pillow. Samantha will usually stay to my right and when Ralph comes to bed, she’ll cuddle up on his legs.

My only problem is that I get a bit hot sometimes with all the kitties around me…

I’ll end this post now, but I’ll post another one soon. I will go catch up on all of your blogs now. I hope all your furbabies and yourselves are well!

Ralph, the kitties and I send love to all! Take care!

Murli the cat · Pictures · Ralph and I · The Cats · Videos

Our last weeks of December 2019

Hello my absolutely wonderful friends! It took me all that time to finish my post… Unbelievable, but our days just have been that way, where I can’t get anything finished, because so many other things had to be done.

I really have to thank you all again, just so that you know how much all of your kind messages and comments mean to me and how thankful I am for all that support and love.

December 18, 2019

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Hero

In the morning of December 18, 2019, little boy Hero had his neutering surgery. Everything went well and he did not seem to be in any pain at all. Just a bit tired and so he basically went to sleep not long after we arrived back home. Since we didn’t sleep much that night, we all just went to have a rest… Ralph, I and the cats in the bed.

At some point, I got woken up because my phone rang. It was the Crematory in Gleisdorf, where my sweet Murli had been cremated. Gleisdorf is a little less than half an hour away by car, depending on traffic. I was informed that I can pick up her Urn whenever I want. So I quickly looked up the times for the trains going to the town and told them I would arrive the next day at 11am. The Crematory is close to the train station.

December 19, 2019

In the morning, one of the first things I did was to finally free poor Samantha from her cone. I wanted her to be free of it and able to go to the toilet herself while I was gone for a few hours, to pick up Murli’s Urn in Gleisdorf.

Samantha simply looked exhausted after two weeks with the cone.

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Samantha after I removed her cone

Thankfully the train I had to take was one of the local trains, which stop at all the stations, including the one that’s near our home, so I didn’t have to go all the way to the main train station in Graz. It’s not even 5 minutes from us with my bicycle.

The train ride itself lasts about 30 minutes, but it feels much shorter. It goes through the countryside with lots of woods and is really lovely. The train arrived a few minutes before 11am and I walked straight to the close by Pet-Crematory.

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The Crematory Murli was cremated at

I thought I took many more photos from in front of the Crematory, but it seems the photos never saved on my phone. Something went wrong, which had probably more to do with the state I was in.

The sweet Lady I had already talked to one the one a few times greeted me as I walked in. It’s beautiful there. Much more beautiful than the Crematory for humans I’ve been to. It feels comforting as soon as you walk in. Friendly and warm. Not to mention that the people I had talked to and the sweet young man who picked up Murli, have been amazing. So understanding and kind. I knew about them for years and so I knew who to contact right away on the morning of Murli’s passing.

The Lady brought me to the room with Murli’s Urn. As soon as I got there, I greeted her as I always did with “Hey baby” and started crying right away. For quite a while. But they were just so kind there. They leave you alone, or stay with you, however you wish. You can also stay as long as you feel you need to before you leave with the Urn.

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Murli’s little urn. The certificate has all the information of the cremation on it, as well as my and Murli’s personal info. I also kept the rose and dried it. It’s now with Murli’s urn.

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Murli’s fur and her paw print on a ceramic heart

They offer to create a paw print on a ceramic and let you decide on the shape of it. I wanted it to be a heart, and the paw print in black, since Murli is a panfur with black paws. I had also asked them for some of Murli’s fur, back when I chose the Urn and paw print.

The Lady helped me to pack it up carefully, making sure it’s safe during my little travel back home. We also talked for a while, as she has cats herself and knows what it all feels like.

And so with Murli’s Urn safely with me, I went to catch the next train home. It definitely feels better now to have her urn back home with us.

It’s still going to be very difficult for quite a while, but that’s what I deal with within my own mind and soul. I want to be my normal and happy self for the other furkids, Samantha, Sonic, Lisa and Hero.

Everyone of you knows what it is like, so I don’t need, or even want to write about the sadness. Instead I want to remember and be grateful for every year, every day I got to spend with Murli my life. Murli was happiness, empathy, love and warmth all packed into a beautiful feline. All the kitties loved her right away. They all felt comfortable around her. When Hero and Lisa first came to us, and they were still absolutely frightened, they were for some reason feeling relaxed and less scared when they were near Murli. Her soul is alive and well and my bond with her will remain forever. I’m so grateful for my life with my beloved little family, which Murli will always remain part of.

Samantha

We worried a lot about Samantha too, as she was really unhappy with her cone. Also, we think any movement for her felt uncomfortable, since the cut was really deep, since the Vet had to make sure to get everything during her surgery, to make sure weird growth can restart in that spot.  Samantha was on pain meds of course, but it might still have been uncomfortable in some way.

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Me feeding Samantha with chicken, the only thing she would eat

Thankfully I was able to keep Samantha healthy during the whole two weeks with her cone; feeding her, giving her water with a syringe and carrying her to the toilet and everywhere else she wanted to be usually. Since she only ate chicken breast, I had to give her a supplement paste in the right amount, to make sure she still gets all the important nutrients and vitamins. When the day came to remove her stitches, Samantha was put on the scale and checked out properly. To my amazement, she had not lost any weight during that time and was well hydrated! The hydration was what I had worried about the most. I knew how much water an adult cat needs every day, and I tried my best to get as close to it as possible. Apparently it’s 50ml for every kg of body-weight.

Samantha started recovering from her ordeal and is doing really well again now. Her scar is healing up great! It’s wonderful to see her happy again.

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Samantha now

Christmas

To do something fun for the cats, I bought a little Christmas tree just for the balcony, so the cats have something interesting to smell at and investigate. They are only out for a few minutes at a time together with us, since it’s way too cold.

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Lisa (left) and Sonic

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Lisa

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Lisa is a little hidden on the left and Hero

The other decoration I had on the living room window, had been on there since the beginning of December. But I kept candles burning ever since the day Murli had passed. That’s what this window looks like:

Later I also put up a tiny little Christmas tree which I decorated and put somewhere Lisa and Hero can’t get to. Samantha and Sonic never tried anything too silly with our Christmas trees anyway.

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I bought that little tree where I had bought the bigger one for the balcony. It still smells lovely! Just for fun and because the cats need some decoration they like, I added some colourful mousies as well. Everyone got some nice Christmas gifts and tasty food. The weather station you can see behind the toys is what I got from Ralph for Christmas, since I’ve been wanting one for many years. It’s awesome!

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Toy mouse Christmas Decoration

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Hero trying to decide which toy to play with now

The cats are having fun with their new toys!

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Hero got to see the rail with the ball first, as the others were still sleeping

Hero and Lisa are great at playing together!

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Sonic and Hero

New Years

Their new toy was quite helpful in trying to distract the cats from all the noise from the fire crackers and fire works at midnight on new years eve! Sonic of course was not worried anyway, since he can’t hear, but Samantha, Hero and Lisa were worried. Though we did quite well in calming them down and making them feel safer. Luckily, it’s not as crazy where we are. It would be a different story right in the city centre.

I didn’t even look at the fire works, and instead stayed with the cats, comforting them.

The last sunset of 2019 was absolutely beautiful.

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And there we are, another year gone by. Actually, a whole decade gone by. But it does not feel like it’s been so long. Despite how fast the time goes by, I am thankful for every second of it. Every moment I got to spend with everyone I love. I am holding on and loving every moment I can spend with Ralph, Samantha, Sonic, Hero and Lisa. And I’m thankful for every single friend I found through posting about Murli and about our life now.

Thank you all for every lovely word of yours and for continuing to visit, despite me not being able to keep up with my replies lots of times. Though I do read and appreciate every single one of them and I’ll reply, even if I’m late.

Ralph, the cats and myself, wish everyone of you happiness for the new year. Wishing good health and wellbeing for human and furry friends, and may everyone be able to spend as much time as they want and can with their loved ones.

Lots of love from us, and purrs from the kitties!

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Lisa and Hero with the red light of the sunset

Everything · Murli the cat · Our friends · Pictures · Ralph and I · The Cats

Thank you all for your love and kindness after the sudden passing of my sweet girl Murli

You all have been so sweet and your many comments all over WordPress, Facebook, Twitter and the Emails mean so much, I can’t even describe how much. It helped my broken heart to keep going.

Internet problems since last WednesdayI just want you to know that we’ve been having really bad trouble with our internet since last Wednesday. It got so incredibly slow, that no site would load properly, or time out altogether. Trying to comment failed mostly and the few replies I got out took multiple tries. Due to my phone internet running on the same network, it had the same issues. Many people in Austria had the same problems with the same provider these days, which is probably due to the big changes they are working on. Thankfully it seems to be working again today and hopefully, it stays that way.

I will reply to all your kind comments as soon as I can, starting tomorrow and during the next days.

Thank you so much for creating this beautiful card for Murli, Sherri-Ellen and BellaDharma and for your thoughts in your blog post. You’re purrfect friends and fur family and we love you both!

BellaDharma LadyMew for Murli
BellaDharma and LadyMew’s card in remembrance of sweet girl Murli

Many of you knew Murli and me for years. I shared so many posts and photos about our everyday lives and what we’re up to, way back before I even knew Ralph. Murli and I made so many wonderful friends, who became really close friends. It does not matter how far apart some of us are living, we feel close to each other and due to how we share our lives with each other. We all had our hearts stolen by each other’s furbabies and feel real heartbreak if one of them passes on. You all know very well about how I feel, so I don’t even need to describe the deep pain I feel in my heart.

It really is thanks to the love and friendship that I keep going. It’s all of it… My love for and from my other sweet furbabies Samantha, Sonic, Hero and Lisa, and of course the love for my wonderful caring and loving husband Ralph, and the love and support of all of you kind friends. Otherwise, I think I would have just lied down in bed and give up for a while.

But I keep my head up for my other kitties and Ralph. It’s not good for the kitties if I cry constantly and give into my heartbreak. I keep busy by caring for everyone and pouring my love on all of them.

It was difficult when everyone slept and I could not go online in any way to reach out or reply to any of you, due to the internet problems. It’s the quiet hours that are the most difficult, which is why I still can not sleep well. It’s only once I become so exhausted from lack of sleep, that I can get some hours in. Eating is another challenge.

I did not expect it to happen so soon. In fact, I was sure we would have a decade or even more left with Murli. I was hoping she will reach her 20s at least.

The only thing that is a slight comfort, is to know that Murli just slept away. She simply laid down to sleep and passed away. Her body had no signs of distress or pain, she was just like she always liked to sleep when she lied down by a heater.

And so I keep on living, carrying the love for Murli in my heart for the rest of my life, together with my beloved family, Ralph, Samantha, Sonic, Hero and Lisa.

The last couple of days

I have candles burning in between the window panes for Murli and I will keep having candles burning for her at the least until the new year. Sonic also loves watching them, as he absolutely loves lights.

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In our home, it’s not just Ralph and me who have been sad and missing Murli. Murli was loved by Sonic, Samantha and also the babies Hero and Lisa. There was something special about her, something that made other cats feel comfortable around her. Everyone wanted her friendship. Sonic especially loved Murli, he really did. It was obvious that he felt very sad for the first couple of days.

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Sonic watches the candles I put in between the window. I put them there for Murli. As a sign for her that we’re thinking of her, that we keep a light going for her. The candles will be burning all the way until the new year at least.

Sonic, who is a pretty vocal kitty boy normally, was very quiet, hardly a peep from him and he kept to himself, just sleeping mostly. Though he did eat and drink properly thankfully. But anytime he did get up from sleep, he would walk around the apartment, looking everywhere for Murli. Sniffing at everything that had her scent, trying to follow it, hoping he would find her. He kept that going for a few days but has given up now. Though I am sure he is still missing her. He is thankfully though much more himself again. Sonic bonded with Hero and Lisa as soon as he met them. I think the friendship he has with the siblings is doing him well now.

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Murli and Samantha relaxing

 

Samantha always enjoyed hanging out with Murli on the balcony in the summer, for hours and hours. I don’t think she even realises exactly what has happened yet, due to her not walking around with her cone. She hasn’t been around in the apartment except on the few cat bed spots she wants to be at.

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Samantha with her cone these days

Regarding her cone, I was not able to use anything that covers her stitches, due to them being wire stitches, as they had to be strong after she ripped out the initial ones. Anything on top of these would make it more difficult for healing, due to the wire stitches getting stuck in anything and with Samantha’s body movement, it would cause irritation. It also helped to not cover it, because it had to drain a bit.

I will use something different, like the wonderful suggestions I got, for my sweet little girl Lisa, when she gets spayed.

We’ve been to the Vet with Samantha today: Everything has healed really well! The stitches have been removed! There is only a little crust hanging on by a little corner still, which is slightly bleeding if it’s being pulled at. It’s only superficial. But she has to keep her cone until tomorrow morning, just to give it a tiny bit more time. As soon as I get up tomorrow morning, I will free her!

Hero and Lisa on Bed
Hero (left) and Lisa

The babies Hero and Lisa haven’t been here long enough yet to be impacted as heavily by Murli’s passing. But they too loved Murli right away. They enjoyed hanging out with her looking out the balcony door, or the bedroom window to watch the birds. They were not worried about her or obviously felt comfortable around her right away. It was so cute to hear them talking to Murli with friendly meows, with their tails straight up.

There was a special moment with Hero and Murli after she passed – Not long after I had found my sweet girl Murli lying on a blanket next to a heater, after she had passed away in her sleep, Hero came along and lied down beside her. Then he took one of his front paws and gently laid it on one of Murli’s front paws. It was very special and words are not doing justice to how it was in reality.

Hero and Lisa are special. They were meant to come into my life at the time they did. I’m sure an angel was looking out for us, knowing about what is going to happen. Maybe it was my beloved Mama?

These two sweet kittens went through so much already in their short lives. They almost died themselves from starvation and dehydration after being abandoned. Hero with his severely injured and infected leg was so very close to death. If they had not been found when they did and by the right person, who did everything to save them, they would not be here. But now they are, and I gained their trust with lots of patience and love. They are healthy and thriving! Happy and feeling right at home with us.

Their lives just started. Murli will always be part of our family, always present in our hearts and minds. I know we will be reunited again once I have to go, but until then, I’ll treasure every single day with the ones I love, as every moment is special and will not return and you may not get another chance.

Love to all of you.

Everything · Murli the cat · Pictures · The Cats

My heart broke today, as my beloved Murli unexpectedly passed away.

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Lisa and Murli watching Hero play

This is how she was and hung out just yesterday. She was happy. Nothing was pointing to anything being wrong.

I just wanted to let you all know, that my sweet girl Murli passed away early this morning.

My heart shattered when I found her lying on one of her spots next to the heater, as if she had simply laid down on her side to sleep and then died. When I looked down to her and saw that her beautiful big eyes were not reacting to my presence and she was lying so still, I knew she was gone. In a panic right away, I went to pet her head, and it felt cold. Her tummy was still a bit warm.

Her last big health check in the late summer showed perfectly normal blood results. Her thyroid was doing fine too with her meds, her Hyperthyroidism was totally under control with her having completely recovered from the symptoms she had from it before we started treatment. She kept the same weight.

Her teeth were regularly sorted out, and all her organs were working normally. There was no sign of any danger. I just don’t know what happened.

I called the pet cemetery people and my sweet Murli was picked up around midday. She’ll be cremated and I will pick up her Urn. They are really lovely and extremely caring and respectful in everything they do.

They will also make a beautiful ceramic heart with her paw print in it. I also chose her Urn, which is also beautiful.

It was so difficult to have to give her body away, but I will get her remains back in about a week.

I held her body a couple times and hugged and cuddled her. I just would have given anything for life to come rushing back into her.

Murli and I had a very special bond. She always knew when I was about to come home, even at random times. She also always knew when I woke up, even if she wasn’t in the room with me. I didn’t have to move, just opening my eyes was enough and she knew I was awake from a few rooms over. Then she would come to me.

She was a happy girl all the way to the end. She took to the sweet kittens Hero and Lisa more and more and loved watching them play. Murli’s tail was always straight up and she had the most beautiful purr.

I wish there would have been any sign for anything being wrong, as I would have gotten her to the Vet in an instant. I wish I would have been able to save her, from whatever was failing in her body. I also wish I would have been with her when she died, and not asleep.

There is so much more I need to tell you all, about what has been going on these days. I am a wreck at the moment, running on hardly any sleep.

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Samantha is a worry as well right now, because she had a little surgery with local anaesthesia to cut out an old scar that had started to change and grow, although it was benign. But it had to be removed and I made sure it was done very quickly, since I didn’t want to take a chance of something like that becoming cancerous.

Thank God it was benign. But now she has to wear a cone, which makes her too worried to move around on her own, because she can’t see her feet. It robs her of her important senses.

Due to that, I removed the cone on Wednesday night (she had the little surgery Wednesday morning). It went alright until  Friday morning, when she had suddenly and very quickly pulled out all her stitches. So I rushed her to the Vet in a Taxi right away. Thankfully it had just happened, so the wound area was still fresh and it was possible to sew her back up. If the area would have dried out already, she would have had to be put under anaesthesia and the area cut out some more, to have fresh tissue that can grow back together again. Dry tissue would not grow together again like that.

We were lucky she didn’t get an infection out of that. Though she had been put on antibiotics anyway.

So now the cone has to stay on. I can’t cover her wound area either, as it needs to be able to drain properly if it has to and it heals better that way. Also, due to the place that area is on her body, it’s very easy for her to reach with her mouth. So I can’t even use anything else, or even just shorten the cone. The cone itself is just exactly long enough for her to not be able to reach it.

Since she is too afraid to move around much with the cone, I have to carry her to the kitty toilet and I feed her by hand and give her water with a syringe.

Just yesterday I went and bought some chicken breast for Samantha and Murli to make them happy with it, as they both are crazy for it. Murli and Samantha were both so excited while I was cooking them and preparing it all for them. Both were meowing and just could not wait. Both of them ate two bowls of chicken breast each.

I just don’t know how I will get over not having my sweet little best friend around me anymore, my Babygirl Murli. We have been together since I adopted her with just a couple weeks old. She only turned 14 in August.

I can’t even put it into words how shattered I feel, how much I miss her and how badly I want her back alive. No, I really do not know how I am going to get over her passing.

But I do have so much love for my sweet 4 remaining babies and I will make sure they will have nothing less than a life filled with love and happiness. I just pray that we have many many more years with them all. I can’t bear to even think of losing one of them too.

I know I will see my lovely Murli again when it’s my time to leave my body, but it’s going to be a long time until we’re all reunited and I will miss her so so much.

Murli on a lovely warm fall day
This was just on October 18, 2019 when we had a wonderfully warm day. Murli was so very happy to hang out on the balcony and she kept going out, even if it’s been cold, at least for a few minutes at a time.